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Common Questions


Why work with a Be a Loving Mirror (BALMSM) Family Recovery Coach?

When a family is hit by addiction, it can feel like your family life has gone down the tubes.  You most likely feel anger and rage, shame, sadness, and overwhelming fear.  BALM is a acronym you can use to bring  peace into your life and help your loved one recover their own sanity as well.  Working with a BALM Family Recovery Coach will teach you these life changing skills.

Too often, when the addict goes into treatment for one month to one year, the family members are left behind.  Many don't see their own recovery as important. Many don't see why family members even need recovery.  After all, it's the addict that has screwed up and brought despair to the family.   Many don't feel they can make the time to drive to meetings or educational programs at the treatment center.  As the weeks go by, the addict is learning and growing, but the famlly is not.  When the addict gets out, these family members don't understand recovery or the new person their loved one is becoming.  As a result, the addict returns to a toxic environment, and the family member feels cheated and often isolated.  No one really focused on them, no one understands how dis-orienting it is to be around this newly-sober person.  They don't understand their loved one's need to go to so many meetings, etc.  Worst of all, no one, including themselves, can understand why they still feel bad.  Family recovery education and transformation is needed to help them along the way. 

Perhaps your loved one is not in treatment.  Many families suffer knowing that their loved one has a problem, but they don't know how to convince them to get help.  Working with a BALM Family Recovery Coach can sooth troubled hearts and minds and that feeling of isolation.  New skills and tools will be learned that can change the atmosphere in the home and in their hearts.  Relationships may improve, and awareness can bring new understandings.  When a family member learns to Be A Loving Mirror, they soon build a new, more-loving approach to their struggling loved one.  No longer alone, family members learn a whole new way of life regardless of their loved one's choices. Remarkably, when they do, their loved ones often choose to join them in recovery as well!

What if I am already attending Al Anon - Nar Anon meetings, seeing a therapist, or participating in a therapeutic support group?

All of the above are supported and encouraged by family recovery coaching.  Many find that working with a BALMSM Family Recovery Coach in conjunction with any/all of the above can help to speed up their personal recovery process.
 
What does the BALMSM program consist of?

There are three components
  • Support - Weekly and as-needed Individual BALM family recovery coaching sessions.  Family members also receive Group coaching calls where families can get their questions answered, receive support, and hear how others are coping with the challenges of a loved one's struggles with substance abuse and other addictions.
  • Information - Education on the 12 Family Recovery Principles presented through weekly life calls, a workbook, and an online archive of over 120 hours of lessons, expert interviews, discussions, recovering speakers and recovering families.  All of this information is organized in an easy-to-digest fashion.
  • Transformation - Tools are received to put the information into practice on a journey of 7 steps that empower families to effectively communicate with their loved one using the BALMSM method.

What happens in a Family Recovery Coaching Session?

Each session is tailored to the client and will vary based on individual needs. In the beginning, we will discuss what you are committed to accomplishing through our work together, and we will begin to create a plan to achieve your goals. We will begin by introducing you to the BALMSM program.  As a new principle is introduced each week, you will share your findings with me.  We will talk about your findings and how to apply what you are learning to your family recovery process.  Periodically, I will give you assignments to help direct your progress. We will work together to acknowledge obstacles, explore alternate perspectives, and celebrate successes. With the conclusion of each session, we will revisit your goals and evaluate the next steps that are needed to achieve these results.

Do I really need a BALMSM Family Recovery Coach?  Can't I just do it by myself?

Without proper guidance, living with active addiction leads to all sorts of ineffective coping strategies.  This in turn leads to lots of strife, hurt feelings, frustration, tears, anger, and a feeling of being alone with no help.  Our experience has shown that the situation is too much for any one person, and it's hard to see your part in "dancing" around your loved one's addiction.  It is extremely helpful to have an outside perspective.  It is critical to work with someone who can speak into the situation from their own experience, strength and hope.  Most likely you have been contributing to your loved one's addiction.  Working with a BALMSM Family Recovery Coach will teach you how to contribute to your loved one's recovery instead. 

How is coaching different from therapy?

While family recovery coaching can be therapeutic, it is not therapy. Coaching is distinct from traditional therapy because it is not designed to address psychological issues. While emotional issues may arise, the primary focus of BALMSM family recovery coaching is designed to teach families a proven method to help them increase their own sanity as well as their loved one's chance at recovery.

What if I am an addiction counselor or member of a treatment facility?

We can partner with you to make this program work for your client population.  If you would like to learn more about the program, please contact me.




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